Real Vampires Have Curves – Gerry Bartlett (Glory St Clair #1)
Penguin Berkley, 2007
318 pages
RRP: US$7.99
ISBN: 978-0-425-22096-2

Reviewed by Liz Grzyb

I love the premise for this series. Vampires have long had the reputation for being classically good looking specimens, who magically gain a perfect body the second they are turned. However, Gerry Bartlett has introduced us to Glory St Clair who was somewhat full-figured when she was turned, now spending the rest of her afterlife as a voluptuous vampire. Glory has the same hang-ups and body issues that women groan about the world over, so she is a fun, fabulous protagonist for this series, who most women would relate very easily to.

Real Vampires Have Curves is easy to read and a great relaxing novel to read when you’re on holidays and you don’t really want to engage your brain overmuch. The story has a nice mix of intrigue, mystery and romance, with Glory being beset by handsome hunks of vampiredom left, right and centre while dealing with a vicious vampire hunter who is killing her friends. We are taken for a fun ride through her world, spiced with a little danger, but the ending is pretty predictable.

I’ve already mentioned that Glory is an engaging protagonist, but there is one really irritating aspect of her construction, and that of all the undead, to tell the truth. They are all, to a greater or lesser extend, psychic, and Glory is very limited in how much she can shield from the others. This means we end up reading way too many conversations where other undead characters are reading Glory’s mind and commenting on it, even when Glory is just giving us a little background information. This put me off so much that even though I otherwise enjoyed the book, I won’t be looking for the next in the series.

Apart from that irritation, the novel was a  fun and entertaining afternoon’s read. Those who like their paranormal romance with humour will enjoy the series.